control

There are so many things out of my control that I worry about. I'm trying to Let Go and Let God but sometimes it is so hard.
 I am still amazed how people act sometimes and how they feel the need to run other's lives. Just when you think they have ceased the crap, it starts again. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!
I am so far away and feel so out of the loop and feel no one wants to keep me in-it's as if certain individuals want me out of the picture and I truly don't understand why.
I find myself having less than Christian thoughts and questioning how these Christian people can treat others in such a way. Then I remind myself-no one is perfect and it's not my place to judge.
When things get stressful I miss my Mom even more. She was the persistent, assertive one. Wish heaven wasn't so far away.

Birthdays

Yesterday was my Mom's birthday, the second one since she passed away last February. In a way I'm proud of myself for not getting upset and then I also feel a little guilty that I thought so little about it. I was aware of the date but I guess not focused on it. I still have days when the grief is overwhelming but those are fewer and fewer. Now I have more short moments of all those feelings versus entire days. So it's true, time does help.
Moving on to this weekend-R is having a pool party for her birthday. She is super excited!! She picked out a Tangled theme! Her birthday is next week and she will be 4. My baby is no longer a toddler, she's a little girl :(.

Summer fun list

What are you doing this summer for fun? We aren't going on vacation so we will just have to find things to do around here. LOTS of people vacation here so we might play tourists for a day or two :)
Some must do things for us this summer and later:
Wonderworks
Seashell hunting early in the morning after a storm
Dolphin cruise
handprints and/or footprints in sand w/ plaster
Trips to bay
Trips to beach
Play in the sprinkler
Nightime walk on beach
Picnic on beach
Gulfworld
Matinee movie
Splatter painting a sheet or something similar outside
St Joe State Park
Maybe camping in the late summer

Lullaby

My little R asked me to sing her "R's song" tonight and I realized I had almost forgotten some of the words. So I thought I would add it here to preserve forever :)

Sleep little R--- go to sleep, Sleep little R--- go to sleep
Close your eyes and dream away, close your eyes and dream away
Dream about happy thoughts, dream about happy thought
Butterflies and fairytales, Sunny days and baby whales
Little ponies brown and white, mommy and R-- flying kites
Tiny fishies swimming by, Lions, tigers, bears, oh my
Building castles in the sand, Daddy and R holding hands
Turtles, frogs, and birdies too
Flowers and trees and the morning dew
Jumping waves and playing catch
Baking cookies by the batch
Sleep little R go to sleep, sleep little R go to sleep

Sometimes LOTS of singing was required to get R to go to sleep or get her back to sleep. I would run out of songs so I just made one up. Hard to believe I miss those sleepless nights and sleep deprived hazy days.

Slacker

So I haven't blogged in forever but not because I've been busy, just slacking. I am no longer working full time which I am enjoying but the drop in income is worrisome. I just started a new job as a contractor. I'm hoping to work 20-25 hours a week before too long.
Must update this thing soon-R and I have been busy :)

More gardening

I am determined to make my garden work this year!!!! That means watering, watering and more watering. This week I planted cucumbers, yellow zuchini, green zuchini, butternut squash, acorn squash, summer squash, 2 kinds of pole beans and regular bush beans. I'm thinking I wilI still need to plant bellpeppers and maybe some green onions. Oh and the hubby bought turnip seeds, might as well give them a try too. I am doing "intensive" gardening and may have planted things too close but we will see. My father-in-law cut down the fig tree that was blocking the sun for me-hopefully that will get things going quicker. 
I can't wait to get my sunflowers in the ground. Just have to figure out a good spot, and a way to keep the puppy from eating, digging, and generally destroying them. 

Random happenings and bad mommy confession

We have had a month of lots of busyness but little actually getting done :)
I spent a week in my hometown at a substance abuse conference, baby was sick for a week (and is again), and I've had a general lack of energy for a few weeks.
The conference was mediocre but I did have a wonderful time seeing some old friends, exploring the campus, and getting to spend time with my Dad every evening. AND I got the always needed CEUs.
I did get tomatoes and a few herbs planted. I am trying buckets for the tomatoes-not sure how that is going to work. I also have prepared my little garden spot for planting, which will be done by this weekend. A few annuals have been added to the flower bed, flower seeds are in the ground and sunflower seeds are in peat pots.

http://familyfun.go.com/crafts/sunflower-sunroom-671975/
 I am super excited about the sunflower house. I saw the idea on Family Fun and decided to give it a try. I am going to plant the sunflowers in a circle, leaving an opening for the "door", and plant morning glories in between the sunflowers.
We have done almost ZERO planned preschool activities in the last three weeks. I know-bad Mommy! Hopefully things will get back in gear soon.

What My Child Is Reading This Week-COW Theme

We just started our Cow Theme week. Our books for the week include: Clancy the Courageous Cow, Click Clack Moo-Cows that Type, Cows (Doyle), What a Wonderful Day to be a Cow, A Calf Is Born, The Cow that Went Oink, The Cow Who Wouldn't Come Down, and Cows (Miller).


I found a free curriculum online that takes some (more like alot) of the planning off of me, so we are giving it a try. It is-Brightly Beaming Steps to Reading Program Preparatory Curriculum by Katrina Lybbert http://www.letteroftheweek.com/index.html . I am changing things around a little by adding a bible verse per theme, adding an extra vocabulary word and having one theme for two weeks versus one.
Our plans for the next two weeks include: making butter from heavy cream by shaking, visiting cows, learning cow facts, having a dairy only snack, cow paper bag puppet, playing with handmade farm animal blocks and most of the activities listed in the curriculum.